I love positive psychology, and today I want to talk about the importance of all emotions. I think it is beneficial to self-growth to learn the skill of being able to experience emotions. Most people avoid those emotions, because I mean who wants to be sad, angry, or depressed right?
However, it is important to not be afraid to experience sadness or anger. Because without sadness, there is no happiness or joy. Without anger, there is no forgiveness or passion.
I am not saying that you are wrong for trying to avoid it, but in order to live authentically and genuinely, and really know yourself, you have to experience a full range of emotions. No matter the situation, never let your emotions overpower your intelligence.
Emotional intelligence is the ability of perceiving emotions, understanding emotions, using emotions and managing emotions. The reason I say this is because I know people who use sarcasm to avoid serious feelings.
The best example I can think of is of me. Someday before, I went to McDonalds to buy me a burger; there I saw a family of three, having their brunch. The moment that catch my sight was, the father having fun with his daughter. It got me emotional, thinking I was not able to spend my precious moments of life with my father, because he was working abroad 13 years of my life. I have never seen my father taking part in any of annual events, parent teachers meeting, etc. Growing up without his presence was very difficult for me which eventually let me into depression and anxiety at the age of 18.
I assumed because I was honest and upfront with my parents about my issues, it would be easier to overcome them. I definitely thought wrong. I’ve been pretty much battling with anxiety and depression most of my life. However, the reason I’ve realized that possibly made my mental health quite difficult to bear was the fact that my parents in the beginning weren’t all that supportive.
My parents are practicing Christianity who believed my mental illness was just all in my head and if I was closer to God, it would all just go away. With them constantly telling me that at the age of 13, I had no idea how to even deal with these issues I had. I would read the Bible and pray as they suggested, but it just made me angrier because I felt like I wasn’t making any progress. I also felt immense pressure like I had to get better in order for my parents to be fulfilled in their faith. It was like I was a prisoner in my own thoughts and I wasn’t allowed to feel how I needed to feel.
My parents kept arguing that if I just prayed more often and really believe in the scripture, I would be a lot better. That did not motivate me to get better help or even keep seeking any help.
As things started to escalate in high school on to college, I, fortunately, found a support system of an amazing friend that made me realize that everything I was feeling was valid. My friend helped me build the courage to confront my parents about my issues.
After some blood, sweat, and tears, my parents came to their senses and took me to a therapist that I ended up really enjoying. He helped me get down to the nitty-gritty of my issues and made me feel so validated. It was extremely liberating to be able to express every emotion completely guilt free with no judgments. My therapist discussed with my parents the process in which would help me get better and that included me being on medication. Though with some hesitation, my parents ended up agreeing that that was the best plan for me.
Anxiety and depression is still something I have to battle every day, but the patience and understanding of everyone around me have made it a lot easier.
Day by day, I motivate myself to take steps into getting out of my comfort zone in order to improve my mental health. I have also grown an appreciation for my parents’ patience. It is difficult to have lived a life in another state with a certain mindset then to raise a child who thinks the complete opposite. So, do take the time and thank those who have supported you in your journey to better mental health because it’s definitely not always the smoothest journey.
There are benefits to being compartmentalizing emotions so you can be functional and logical but make yourself a priority once in a while. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary.
However, while many people think emotions are a weakness, it takes strength to be able to fully feel emotions and still be a functional person. Now, when I say fully feel emotions, I don’t mean to be depressed or anxious, but I mean to allow one to feel an emotion, acknowledge it, and then move on.
The first leg of our helaing journey, we spend paralyzed. We watch ourselves dpoing the same old thing, unable to stop it. This is normal. We begin deaf. Then, we learn to listen. Then, we gain the ability to speak. Pressurizing yourselves to take action right away. As to do the early phases of awarness, paralyzes teaches you to embrace uncertainity, build curiosity, and practiceacceptance. What a gift, life keeps you from speeding through her lessons.